I'm hungry, sir

 It's 9:30am and you are late son

What is your excuse this time?

Wipe that smirk from your face

Go and stand there, at the back of the line.

He's always late him and he never listens

I'll ask him a question; he mumbles replies

I've never known a boy who daydreams so much

And in the afternoon, he is quite and mostly cries

Didn't he used to be a happy little boy

With a laugh that was quite contagious

I can't seem to get to the bottom of his problems

And when I try, he bursts out with rages

Late again but this time he looked so different

He looked at me with a look I hadn't seen before

I took a deep breath, looked lovingly in to his eyes

'Sir, my dad can't afford to feed us all'

My heart sank and I went to me knees

My eyes welled with guilt at this 8 year old boy

He only had one meal every single day

My job, to find the child's lost joy

I told him I would help and speak to people I know

This stops now and support with be found

That night I cried as I struggled to understand

Another family that has nearly drowned

It's 8:30am and you are early again son

He laughed as he ate a breakfast bar

'Sir, I like getting in early.  I like our chats'

Son, you've now turned in to a superstar!

Stay Strong

 It's 3 o'clock in the morning and another sleepless night

Thoughts of insecurity and the demons start to fight

The clock keeps ticking but the time remains so still

Alone in the darken room and I no longer have the will

A bright beam of sunlight comes searching through the room

Unable to face the day as the smallest demons still loom

Each step met with a lethargic pause and a helpless small tear

Since when did I hate myself and live in a world I fear

Not knowing who I am and where to find a helping hand

People don't see the hurt; they will never understand

An unknown truth still hides behind the weak misguided smile

For years I've known this torture; for years I've been in denial

Each day gets harder and harder to operate my usual self

Occupying body and mind is difficult when fighting mental health

The proverbial four walls close in and the space quickly disappears

My mind begins to race as the demons go through their gears

A message from a friend came arrowing out of the blue

It broke my silence when they simply asked, 'Mate, how are you?"

The flood gates burst open and a call shortly ensued

I couldn't believe the support; I was overwhelmingly moved

My door is always open but I will never understand

But I will listen to your thoughts and I'll even hold your hand

In these times of difficulty, I'm only a phone call away

It is important we all believe and say that it's ok not to be ok.

Broken

The morning light wakes me from my sleep
I’m all alone
I’m without you

 

Another dream dreaming  just of you

Your golden hair

Hollywood eyes

 

But you gave me

 

Chorus

Broken dreams

Broken lies

Broken hopes

And Broken cries

 

Broken days

Broken parts

Broken nights

And broken hearts

 

I didn’t know I was broken until I met you

You gave me hope

My life fulfilled

 

I keep telling myself it was all my fault

Don’t really know

Unanswered truths

 

And you gave me

 

Chorus

Broken dreams

Broken lies

Broken hopes

And Broken cries

 

Broken days

Broken parts

Broken nights

And broken hearts

 

 

Bridge

I’ll never regret what you gave me

I’d do it all again in a heart beat

 

I’m still telling myself it will all work out

Back together

Out of my dreams

 

I sit here silently from the side lines

It could have been

But you’ve moved on

 

And I’m still broken

Just Stay In (Tune: Let it go)

Just Stay In (Tune: Let it Go)

The sun comes down on a crowded beach

Not a towel left alone

A kingdom of stupidity

But they all should be at home

The anger is rushing like a swirling storm inside

Couldn’t keep it in, heaven knows I’ve tried

Pick up your towels, Get in your car

Don’t care if you have travelled near or far

Behave, grow up, just go on home

Well, go on home

Just stay in, just stay in

Go on home and close your doors

Just stay in, just stay in

Get used to being bores

We all care, NHS to stay

Let our health carry on

The queues never bothered us anyway

It’s funny how social distance makes everything seem small

And the fools that once controlled us can’t get to us at all

It’s time to rise and now be strong

To test us all can’t be so wrong

No time, no lies , no playing out

I’m out

Just stay in, just stay in

We can see the clouds and the sky

Just stay in, just stay in

Don’t make us mad and cry

Here we are, a pandemic

Hope the fools stay in

Our hopes fading, the NHS is overworked

Our volunteers on hand, NHS is now reworked

And one by one the human race starts to survive

We’re never going back, we’re all glad to be alive

Just stay in, just stay in

The world together as one

Just stay in, just stay in

The virus now has gone

Here we stand, a United Earth

Let the fun begin

The sun will be shining another day

Goodbye

I knew you would be leaving

But I didn’t know so soon

It was hard to say goodbye

But none of us are immune

The world is a different place

It’s different from before

I want you to be safe

So please all stay indoor

I hope I’ve taught you well

Made a small difference

With memories in your mind

You’ll remember a fond experience

At times I had to feed you

But that was just the start

I’m not sure what will happen

I hope I played an important part

When you left I cried

I’m not ashamed to say

You always smiled at me

Even though you struggled each day

As a teacher I just don’t teach

I love, care and guide

I’m the law in your hectic life

But you knew I have a soft side

I’m there when you are broke

Putting you back together

I’m there to catch your tears

You are in my thoughts forever

Now as the uncertainty begins

And I won’t see you again

Be sure I’ll have your back

And I’ll never forget your name

Be My Reason

Sometimes in life we take things for granted

Like a smile on our face and love in our heart

The tears we shed are our inner thoughts

Reminding us of the demons inside each day

Protected by our mundane daily routine

A wave and a nod to the passing stranger

Thinking there is no way it can happen to me

Life becomes difficult

Chorus:

Be my reason to walk

Be my reason to dance

Be my reason to smile

Be my reason I get up in the morning

Be my reason to love

Be my reason to breathe

Be my reason to live

Trapped in a cage that no-one can see

The face in the mirror is an unknown image

People only see me from the outside

They don’t see me from the inside

I try to brave, I try to smile

Each passing day becomes harder to live

Where do I turn?  Who can I talk too

A struggle only some will ever see

Bridge:

It’s time we opened up to let the world outside see

None of us our perfect, not you and not me

It’s time to talk we all agree

Lost in a world

I don’t know where to turn

I don’t know what to say

trying desperately to fit in

But I’m always on the edge

A one-dimensional mind

With a three-dimensional soul

Reaching for something

Something too far away

Chorus:

I’m lost, lost in a world I don’t belong

Trying to find my escape

Trying to find the words,

Unable to speak, unable to tell the truth

I’m lost but I don’t want to be found

Skirting on the edges of society

Trying to find my crowd

But I don’t know who that is

I’m in the shadows

I’m behind my mask

The world a different place

A million thoughts

Conflicting and confusing

Bridge:

Help me find my world

A world where I can be me

Help me find my crowd

A crowd where they see what I see

Aladdin at St Helens Theatre Royal

2^nd January 2020

Well, 2020 certainly started with a bang for those people lucky enough to spend an afternoon at the Theatre Royal, St Helens.  Having watched previous pantomimes at the theatre over the years, I was expecting the same high standard.  For me, it is easy to keep churning out the pantomimes without updating or tweaking but St Helens have certainly not rested on the standard from previous years.  In fact, this was by far the best one!  Superbly written by resident dame Si Foster, who manged to keep all the old favourite jokes and routines in.  He was also clever enough in his writing to include local references and opportunities for it to go wrong, which is very important for any pantomime.

Robin Windsor was the big draw and played the main part of Aladdin.  Of course, we knew he could dance from his ‘Strictly’ days but, to my surprise, he can offer much more than this.  He was a perfect for his ‘comedy’  partner Scott Gallagher.  I had never seen Scott perform before and, for me, he was one of the best I’ve seen in this role.  He had great comic timing and was so into his role that he even forgot one or two lines! I have to admit, I do like to see the performers trying to make each other laugh as this keeps the performances fresh.  Scott did very well with the four young girls during the ‘Floss’ routine and thought of some great lines on the spot.

Speaking of making others laugh on stage, I have to say the actor playing the police officer was terrific and perfect for the role.  He had a very good singing voice and did a great ‘Sing Off’ with Phillip McGuinness.  The actors name I don’t recall as not on the poster but I have to say he was superb and a joy to watch.  He had a real connection with the audience, which can be difficult with an afternoon show. Jenna O’Hara as the ‘Slave of the ring’ and Kai Jolley as ‘Genie’ gave very good performances too.

No pantomime can be great without a great ‘baddie’ and we certainly had that with Phillip McGuinness.  He brings a physicality to the role that others don’t simply have.  His mannerisms are superb and the audience loved to boo him especially when he was trying to ‘woo’ the Princess, Olivia Sloyan.  In all my time watching pantomimes, I have never seen a more perfect princess.  She is beautifully stunning and a genuine triple threat – Dancing, singing and acting!  What I enjoyed the most in her performance was the laughing she did on stage at other actors. 

And finally, a massive well done to the support cast of singers, dancers and technical staff.  I genuinely think that this theatre keeps giving audiences great pantomimes and this is certainly the best yet!  There is still time to go and see it and a must if you love live theatre.

Be there

Days become darker

Thoughts begin to match

Nights become lonely

Life becomes detached

Silently surrendering

Brave face appears

Hurt behind the smile

Pain behind the tears

A shrinking recluse

A world unable to face

Life now a struggle

A struggle to replace

A friend came calling

Answering a cry

Didn’t want a reason

Never asked for a why

Time spent talking

Shadows disappear

No judgement given

Life back in gear

Days becoming lighter

Thoughts begin to match

Nights no longer lonely

Life no longer detached

I’m Sorry

I’ve tried to figure out what I did wrong

Every day I think about it for far too long

Things were going well but I pushed too hard

The messages stopped and you put up your guard

Chorus

I’m sorry I couldn’t live up to be the man of your dreams

I’m sorry that you couldn’t see a future with me

I’m sorry if I hurt you but I’m not sure what I did

I’m sorry that you couldn’t see the love within me

Not a day goes by without your picture in my mind

The bottom line is life can sometimes be unkind

I’ve tried to move on but no-one compares to you

If feelings were a colour, then tonight I’m blue

When I see you again, I don’t know what to say

I’m trying too hard to keep my feelings at bay

My stomach in knots and I begin to talk too fast

Looking for a leading lady, then you’re the perfect cast

Bridge

You get more beautiful each and every day

A second chance?  I’ll continue to pray

Photograph

A stranger’s photograph

You were picture perfect inside the frame

You stood there glowing

Your smile was gleaming

Your eyes told me all I knew

A stranger now but never more

Love sick but you are the cure

Love speaks

Through a photograph

our eyes meet

Unknown hearts

sync their beat

No longer alone

I find out who you are

We exchange numbers with our friends

The moment I saw you

We connected instantly

Life would never be the same

A friend now and ever more

Love sick but you are the cure

Love speaks

Through a photograph

our eyes meet

Unknown hearts

sync their beat

No longer alone

Now I am dating you

I hold you hand walking down the street

I can’t believe my luck

Heads begin to turn

I’m luckiest man alive

A lover now and never more

Love sick and you are the cure

Love speaks

Through a photograph

our eyes meet

Unknown hearts

sync their beat

No longer alone